When I was younger, I had a neighbor that my family was really close to. She always had some craft going on and would always be so sweet to me. One day I went over to her house and she asked me what my favorite word was. My six year old self replied, “love.” She then proceeded to spell love with a strip of metal and put it in a picture frame. Since then, she has moved away as have I, but I still have it in my room.
Love has been an important part of my life. Love for my family and friends, the uphill battle of self love, love for nature and love for creating just about anything. My views on love, especially of romantic relationships, have been shaped by my parents and siblings, these healthy relationships that I was exposed to as a kid. My parents’ relationship, as well as my own with my siblings, have given me a starting block for what I want when I eventually start dating.
I was homeschooled from preschool until eighth grade. So when I started eighth grade, my focus was to keep up with everything that was thrown at me. Making friends with people who have known each other for almost their entire life is hard. Love was the last thing on my mind, so nothing about my perception of it changed. It’s just middle school. I thought that love in high school was going to be something like in the movies, but in reality it’s never like the movies. Dancing in the rain, love letters, playing in the ocean and snow; all of these things are in some relationships, just a hope, wish or thought.
I grew up reading books where the girl gets the guy and they live happily ever after, books about heroes and tragedies, books where the guy falls in love first. These things woven into the stories never taking the limelight but still shining through. These relationships not only being of two people who are attracted to each other. But of people who actually help each other grow and support each other.
Movies and music only proved to further to ingrain this romantic way of looking at the world. Seeing not only a the world as what it is, but what it could be. Finding comfort in the silence and friendship in the rain. Looking for the good so that it appears the brightest and finding opportunities in what was lost.
My older sister once said to me that “love is seeing others’ hearts with your own heart. It’s a connection beyond what we see with our eyes” and it is true. Love isn’t about what is on the surface. It is a connection of hearts, it is an understanding that whatever happens you will be there for each other. This stays true for friendships as well. You need to have an understanding of each other, and the trust that happens when communication is present. As the saying goes communication is key, and this is an absolute fact. In any relationship you need communication. it is communication that helps people see the other perspective.
Through everything that I have been through, my view on love has stayed almost the same with some changes happening over the years. However, the core idea has stayed the same: That love is something that is precious and you give to the people that are important to you. No matter if they are friends, family or a partner.
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High Expectations Low Results: How My View of Love has Been Affected by My Life
How my childhood has affected my view on love
Julia Berg, staff writer
February 2, 2024
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